1.  I find my psoriasis has spread to my scalp.  There are now also a few small patches on my already acne-scarred face.  Since I neither drink alcohol nor smoke, I can only attribute its aggravation to stress (if indeed it is a true contributing factor).  I wonder if distress counts?  Does prolonged grief and unhappiness equate 'stress'?   Mine is a mild or possibly moderate condition, but it seems to have only started in the last few years and has been recurring since.  If it has spread, it is not improbable that it may continue to do so.  I've also become intrigued by the possibility of psoriatic arthritis, which may explain the recent, peculiar and hitherto unknown pain in my right knee.  It can happen at any age too, though as yet it is probably too early to have developed already.  Hmm. 

2.  I dreamt about my grandfather twice in recent days.  Last week, I dreamt I found him in tears at the loss of somebody, who does not exist in real life, but who was apparently of great importance to us in that dream.  I burst into tears too when he told me the news.  Of course, the moment I awoke, I found myself in some ridiculous anxiety about what the thing could mean.  Of late I have become excessively anxious about the health and well-being, and above all, the continued existence indeed, of the people dearest to me.  Given the absurd fragility of my emotional state in present times and the dreadfully unhappy state of the world, I have what might be irrational fears about unfortunate things threatening the lives of my loved ones.  After that dream, the person I was most worried about was my grandfather himself, who is quite well back in Chiang Mai.

Last night, I dreamt about him again.  This time he was perfectly happy - and laughing so heartily such as I have not heard him these many years.  And still, I was no less worried when I got up.   More so that I should have dreamt of him twice so closely together, when he does not in fact figure much in my daily waking thoughts.

3.  I put on so little weight as it is, but I can confess that I have not been eating as I ought, or as I have usually done (that is to say, copiously) during the last few months.  My hair at the moment is also the longest it has ever been.  My mother tells me I look even thinner with it.  But it would not surprise me to find that I actually have lost weight.  If even I appear to notice it, then it is probably true.  I also am rather inclined to suppose (hilarious though the idea is) that my stomach has so become accustomed to small and irregular portions, that I find myself feeling full sooner than I have done before.  It can't be helping things much.

4. Finally, something lighthearted  pinched from rhfay.

Your result for The What Middle Earth race do you belong to Test...

Wizard

Take The What Middle Earth race do you belong to Test at HelloQuiz

 

The weather has been so very warm these past few days here, it's curious that I should have unearthed this old, unfinished Christmas-themed project recently whilst rooting about for more watercolour paper.


Goodnight!

I find myself once again panicking  - about two deadlines this time. Argh.  My apologies if I haven't been leaving comments on friends' posts or replying to messages.

My recent entries have been too much full of gloom (well, I did warn some of you).  Of course, you always have the choice of ignoring these, since I almost always warn beforehand if it's going to be especially despondent.  Though I do wonder whether I oughtn't to dispense with all such emotive things and simply post pictures exclusively...

At all events, here's a glimpse of one of the things making me panic...



Oh, grief, look at the time...

I'm a little late in the day with this - but not too late yet.

It's Shakespeare's birthday today (23rd April). I thought that alone was worth a journal entry.

DUKE: And what's her history?
VIOLA: A blank, my lord. She never told her love,
But let concealment, like a worm i' the bud,
Feed on her damask cheek: she pined in thought,
And with a green and yellow melancholy
She sat like patience on a monument,
Smiling at grief. Was not this love indeed?

Twelfth Night, 2. 4

There are better quotations to be chosen, but this seems to be on the surface of my mind at the moment...

A perambulating and rather sorrowful post.  It's also rather long as it deals with two events last week.  Please feel free to skip straight to the (hopefully) mildly interesting illustrations if you'd much rather.


These pages are from an anthology of animal stories published by Kingfisher.  The extract I illustrated is from Dick king Smith's The Hodgeheg.  I expect it should be available soon, if not already.  I don't have my artist's copies of it yet.  These scans were made, as usual, by the ever reliable funkyfilly. Thank you so much.

I've heard word from Horsing Around that the casting of my Gillespie is in full swing, and with luck, all the copies might be ready to ship very soon.

Here is a photograph of the first resin copy, taken by funkyfilly when she visited them for some supplies.  I thought I'd ask her to be my reporter, so to speak.


Here is my original sculpture.  Hopefully you can get a good idea of what it looks like.  And here are some progress pictures of when it was being sculpted. 

In other news, I have to attend a party given by my agent at The London Book Fair tomorrow, as there'll be publishers and other clients there.  I'm not especially looking forward to it and feel rather foolish and queasy.  I've never been very good with parties at all, and there'll be so many people at this one...

On Wednesday afternoon, I'm to read to some children at the 'Aylesbury Big Read', a local community event.  I have trouble getting my feeble voice heard most of the time. I can hardly imagine what a group of young children in a small hall are going to be like.  I may be good with my cousins' children, but that's rather a different matter. Oh, help...